September 20, 2005
eleven na kami
CHAPTER 11 : Home Again?
Derek reached for the helping hand and said "Thanks".Derek dusted himself off when the peson asked, "Derek?" Derek froze, he knew that voice but he didn't want to remember it. The memories he had with that sweet, almost musical, voice, the laughs, and the
loving moments he had with it. But he then stopped, it was impossible... she wasn't anywhere near here. How can it be that he would hear the voice of..."Carrie? Is that you?" he asked hesitantly."Yes Derek, it's me..." she said. Derek was now feeling nervous, mad, angry...he didn't want to see her, after what she had done to him... "How are you, but.. wait. Why are you here? I thought you were gone forever, right? You left me didn't you? You crushed my heart and didn't do anything to help it even just a little bit..." this, Derek said only in his mind. He couldnt say it so he just stood there waiting for Carrie to do something.. preferably, to leave..."So, what are you doing here?" Carrie asked, "Your house is like on the other side of town?""Um...", and Derek mumbled something incoherently"Okay.. but why is Tita cying in your car?!" Carrie pointed to Derek's mom (who was still banging her head on the steering wheel) inside their car."Um..." Derek mumbled yet again. He desperately tried to fight the urge to say something bad to her. He tried, and he was doing it... If he just kept on mumbling then everything will be okay. But then he heard Carrie.."Derek? Okay, I'm going now.." And just when he thought he was already okay, that he was over her and that he wouldn't say anything, he grabbed her arm and trapped her in an embrace."Carrie!" Derek started crying as he tried to still not say anything bad. "Why? Why did you leave me! Dont you know that I live my life only for you?! Dont you know that you are the only one I recognize as god? You are my world Carrie.. why the hell did you leave me all alone?""Derek...""Shhhh." Derek stopped her. "Let me finish. Are you that numb to not feel the overwhelming love that I have shown you? ARE YOU?! Dont you care of what becomes of me?? After you left.... I had nothing!! Nothing to hope for, nothing to feel happy about! You were the only thing that made this life meaningful. You were the only reason that I chose to continue in this world!""Derek...""I'm not done yet...""Derek! Wait, I have something to confess.. I.. I didn't leave.....""What???.. You didnt.. didn't.. leave??"Carrie nodded and answered, "I stayed here, waiting for you. I wanted to see if you really did love me... I wanted to see what you would do to have me.. I was in vain.. But you didnt do anything to find me, did you? Instead you went on! And now here you tell me that you were a wreck?? That I didnt care? That I didnt love you? What kind of
bullshit is that? I loved you so much that I didnt want to force you to love me! I didnt want to suffocate you that's why I told you I left..."
Derek didn't say anything. He was stunned. He didn't know what to do.. or what to feel. Should he get angry? Should he hate her? Or should he hate himself for being a coward and not doing anything? He was confused.. yet amazed.. with how things were happening around him.. with all the things that he had been finding out.. Derek was completely lost in his thoughts when he heard Carrie shout."Derek! Say something! If you're mad at me, go ahead and tell me! If you hate me, tell me! Yell at me! But if.. if you still love me.. kiss me.."Carrie's last few words echoed in his mind. What was he supposed to do? He loved her and yet he hated her! She hurt him.. she made him miserable... What should he tell her? What should he do? He stared at her for a while and then...HALA! ANO NA!!! hahahaha. ano nang ginawa ni Derek? PUSTA NA! :D- by shortstory and bestseller :D (pero gamit account ni bestseller. haha)
chapter inked at 7:31 PM
by MIGGY